Live Fully

Dress for Success - How to do It

 

Dressing for success involves a couple things. Wearing clothes that fits your body nicely, simple well fitting shoes and hairstyle that leans a little more to the conservative side are some of the ingredients of dressing for success.

 

   In my understanding success means being taken seriously, being treated as if you are an intelligent person, being respected by your peers.

 

   How many times have you not seen women in particular dress in very tight fitting clothes - skirts and pants -  and tops that have to be stretched to button? That is awful. It does not do justice to the person and if the intention was to appear thinner, tight clothes makes one look even fatter because as you look at these people you’re thinking that the person has become too fat for her dress. It makes you look as though you have just put on weight.

 

    For someone who is a little on the heavier side, wearing clothes that fit you right is key to your success. I would urge you to iinvest in good quality clothes and show off the side of yourself that you like the best. You will find yourself walking in grace and beauty. People will look at you and do not see the weight but the person in such beautifully, fitted clothes. When we feel good in what we wear we give off an aura that says, look at me, am I not perfect?  Many times I have had to take a second look at some heavier women and I say to myself there is a beautiful woman who is confident. Confidence is beauty. I also turn around and look at women with badly fitted clothes and say a prayer for that person to come into her own. I can see her struggles of wanting to be ”thin” and think that by highlighting her weight with smaller size clothes no one will notice. That is self delusion.

 

    If you want to look the part of a successful woman you have to feel that through and through. You have to accept that you are overweight, promise to deal with it and in the meantime, respect your body and give it comfortable clothes.  Maybe you need to invest in a professional stylist to give you  advice as to the colour that matches your complexion or the type of clothes to wear to flatter your perceived flaws and highlight your perceived positive parts of your body. That will be money well spent.

 

    I am not trying advocate that thin is in. My advocacy has and will always be to encourage people to bring out the inner self to dance with the outer self.  When you express yourself from the inside out you will always look beautiful, successful, confident and intelligent.

Moving Ahead Looking Ahead

There are those who will tell you to learn from your past mistakes.  I say that every day we get a chance to be better than we were yesterday. It's like a brand new page, a brand new slate in which to write. Each day we are different than were were yesterday because into our system we have incorporated new knowledge. Let each day stand for a page and say to yourself, what am I going to write on this page to bring together everything that I have learned up to this point in time. It's about being the best you can, putting your best foot forward. How do we do that? By keeping our connection to the Source of our being strong and clear.

To live fully, to live consciously, to live happily and contentedly each day give yourself a task. It is a simple task. Ask yourself, how can I be the light in someone else's life? - maybe you can drop a dollar in a beggar's pot, you can smile and offer a blessing to a homeless person, you can compliment a co-worker on how good they are or you can offer to help in a cause that will help others. There is so much you can do to enrich someone's life.

What I am trying to say is that we are here to serve. Service is our highest calling and when we serve honestly, in spirit and with the best intentions the reward for us is a thousand fold. You will find that the bonds of despair in yourself broken, you will find that you will have abundance in your life.

So, instead of trying to learn from your mistakes (they are way to0 many), make a mark on your slate today that incorporate everything that is good about you into it and so you move towards perfection, towards wholeness and towards light in your life. Think not of the past or the future but the present moment. Think of now.  It is all you have.

Have you thought about what you are going to do today to move your life forward.

Are you suffering from an addictions? You are not alone!

Most of us know someone who is struggling with addictions. In fact I would go so far as to say that many of us are suffering from addictions ourselves, some without even being conscious of it.
  There are all kinds of addictions, there’s addiction to cigarette, food, to sex, to alcohol, drugs and to cheating on our spouses.  We judge addicts very harshly especially sex addicts and drug addicts – these are like the lowest of the low. I myself, before I was enlightened, judged these folks harshly for being weak and using their addictions to get what they want or as a pretext for being just who they are – good for nothing. I was wrong. I was being judgmental.

   A few nights ago I listened to Tatum O’Neal, the sweet little girl who everyone loved as a child but many now judge her harshly for being and addict and losing her children. Somehow when men are addicts they are not judged as harshly but women, mothers are held at a higher standard.

   It’s as though I felt the pain of Tatum as she struggled to come to terms with her addiction and her recent trouble with the law. She spoke of the shame and degradation she felt as a 44 year old mother being hauled to jail; she spoke about the shame she had brought on her children who are in university and would have to face their mother’s shame. It was a lot of shame.  It seems so unfair.

   A person suffering from high blood pressure, cancer, cystic fibrosis or any other disease is not ashamed of their illness.  Why should addicts be ashamed? Why do we as a society think it is so easy to stop being addicted?  Who made us judge over these sick people?  We are not here to judge but to love and support. When we try to understand what is behind the addiction we may become more empathetic towards our loved ones and even strangers who are struck down by this illness. Judging, chastising and trying to shame them into subjection will only drive the person deeper into his or her addiction. You cannot be in a greater hell than the person who is addicted.  They are not only addicted but also conflicted and struggling for life even though it may not seem so to the outsider. Every heart knows it pain.

    Addiction is however a spiritual illness. Overcoming addictions is to surrender one’s life to a power greater than himself. The twelve-step program has worked well and a proven success. Even if you do not believe in God, Creator you have to believe in something to get through this, something beyond you. Since you might have tried everything why not give God, the Creator a chance before you rule Her out. Because you have to acknowledge that you are a child of the Universe, a child of God, the Creator and you have to ask and trust in the Guidance the Messengers of God have given us.  God is The   physician an addict needs to help her. Let God into your heart and feel your spirit lifted.  You are a worthwhile human being because you have been created in God’s image, you are a piece of God and you are loved and cared for but to receive the love you have to open your heart and arms to receive it.  The ego within us runs counter to our God spirit because the ego thinks it is in charge but we all know by now that it isn’t. Humility is strength.  Observe the Dalai Lama; he appears to be the epitome of humility and the world clamor for him in a way they have not clamored for any other spiritual leader in recent times. There is something about humility we like as human beings and they attract we are attracted to humility because it is a reflection of that God spirit because God is humble.

   Oprah kept asking Tatum what is she trying to bury with drugs. Tatum was not sure but as she spoke, it is the worthlessness she feels about herself. In spite of the charmed life she lived as a movie actress and a child of rich famous people, the little girl inside still seeks approval, still needs to be validated by outsiders, still needs to feel she is good enough.  That is sad.  Perhaps she grew up too fast, perhaps the circumstances of her life has given her this experience. In the larger scheme of things, perhaps this is the experience she came on this earth to have to strengthen her spirit for the life ahead.

    According to the Baha’i  faith, we enter this world as we enter our mother’s womb. This is our incubation for life everlasting and therefore we need to be well prepared spiritually to lead healthy successful lives in eternity.  This human excursion is just that a passing phase for we are spiritual beings having this human experience.

    Dr. Wayne Dyer said that we lose our way when we are disconnected from the Source of our being. Disconnection brings pain. For all those of us who are afflicted with spiritual illnesses we need to ask ourselves, when was the last time we had a spiritual tune up? We all know if we do not tune up our car regularly with the right type of oil etc. that soon the car will stall and we’ll have to pay that much more to get the problem fixed. When we are disconnected from our Source after a while we feel so lost, so alone, so hopeless and to energize ourselves we turn to self-destructive behaviors like drinking, drugs, sex and so on, short term fixes that need less and less turn around time to keep the little feelings of well-being alive. It becomes a downward spiral. Stop.

 

 

 

Meditation:

I am part of the organic human family I am connected to my humanity through my connection with the Creator who created us all, the earth and all that is with in it. Once I am connected to my Creator, the Source of all abundance, love, hope I have nothing to fear, all is good, I am good, God is good.

TRUTH

What is truth? We are told to speak the truth by poets, avatars, and political leaders and by our parents. Truth is a virtue we all aspire to because it is in our nature as human being to be truthful.  We were born truthful but somewhere along the way we learned that speaking the truth sometimes brings negative results to us and so we begin to learn to hide the truth and with that we have followed the steep road of deception to where we are today.  Our deception, my friends, have led us to this sorry fork in the road in which we find ourselves. One road leads to a life uncomplicated, straightforward and truthful and the other filled with glamour, popularity, deceit and dysfunctional existence.  We often choose short-term gain for long-term loss.
  Somewhere in the bible is this quote "for what would it profit a man if he gains the whole world but loses his own soul?"
   Truth is a spiritual quality that those who walk the way of the spirit try to embrace and be conscious of every single moment of the day. If you practice telling the truth, after a while it becomes a habit; you just speak it without censor - trying to pretty it up which then becomes a lie.
   If we follow the example of children we may learn how to be truthful again. Because like I said we were born to speak truth.  Observe little children, talk to them and listen to them you will hear words that are pure with no frills. They give you their honest opinions and answers to your questions, which sometimes adults cannot deal with and may reactive negatively to that truth teaching the child that to tell the truth is bad. 
   The truth offers us freedom and lightness of heart.   I am not saying that we should go out of our way to speak truth that may hurt someone. Telling a child who has been born with a disability that he or she is ugly is not the truth even though it may be the truthful opinion of a person.  Therefore saying something like that could be hurtful and we can train our children and ourselves to look for the beauty in such persons.  The same life-force that runs through each of us runs through persons with disabilities and it is incumbent upon us to look past the physical attributes and to the spirit radiating from that person and ask ourselves the question why did the Creator allowed this person existence in the this earthly form?  Perhaps it is to teach us a lesson in tolerance and acceptance of compassion.
   Fear is at the root of every lie; the fear of losing something you believe you have - love, power, self-esteem all the trappings of the ego.
  Falsehoods create a veil between people that prevents total cohesion of mind.  Let us not be fooled that we can fool anyone.On a psychic level we can sense the veil, sense that something just does not jive even though we many not be able to put our finger on the problem.  There is nothing like a little white lie or a big black lie.  Each lie impacts the spirit in the same way. It's like it is a hurt to the spirit. When you speak the truth, act your truth and live your truth you will feel like a whole person spiritually and people will be automatically attracted you and embrace you honestly. You will be loved for your truth, you will be respected for your truth and truste b for your truth.


Simple steps you can take to be more truthful
Before you speak or act ask yourself what am I afraid of?
How does that make you feel?
What is the worst thing that can happen if I speak the truth?
What is the best reward I can expect for being truthful?

Labour Day Reflection

Happy Labour Day! Isn’t life just wonderful?  Imagine we are having a day off just because we have developed more human ways of treating each other. In the past people were treated like machines with little care for them as human being. They were supposed to go to work, put work first, last and center. Today we hear men talking about wanting to spend quality time with their wives and children.  Many have come to realize that the most important thing in their lives is family.  Work is important too because without work you cannot take care of your family as you should, but work must be put into context to balance with every other part of a human life needs. 

   Some people are happy to be away from work but not to spend time with families, just to not have to show up and face co-workers or bosses who may be bullies. In other words, work that make you sick but you still show up.

   Why does work make you sick or unhappy? Check yourself, is it because you are not given recognition? Is it because you are treated with disrespect, no one takes you seriously at work? Is it because you resent your younger supervisor who may be a woman?  These stresses are all triggered by your own ego. 

  Let’s look at work in this way.  Baha’u’llah said in this new world order let’s consider work as worship “all effort and exertion put forth by man from the fullness of his heart is worship, if it is prompted by the highest motives and the will to do service to humanity.  This is worship:  to serve mankind and to minister to the needs of the people.  Service is prayer.  A physician ministering to the sick, gently, tenderly, free from prejudice and believing in the solidarity of the human race, he is giving praise.”    (`Abdu'l-Baha:  Paris Talks, pp. 176-177).

   Take your ego out of the work, though I know this will be difficult, and concentrate of what your work means to others, how are you contributing to the betterment of society through your work and find the satisfaction in that. Once you place yourself and your work within this context, no one will be able to rattle your cage easily.  They may try but your joy of purpose will throw them and they’ll leave you alone but you must do your best.   

   If you are a public servant, make someone day happy, listen, attend and give your best service to that individual; if you are a salesperson, be enthusiastic, helpful, honest and smile to the customer who comes your way, see what ever you are doing as service and gratitude to your Creator.  In that way you will overcome any negativity that may want to creep in to your work life.

Meditation: God, the Creator of the Universe is in charge therefore nothing can go wrong. Each time I go to work I am honoring the Creator in body mind and spirit and with that Armour none can stand against me.